How do you respond to the deep losses that come into our lives, threatening to shatter souls?
If I could see you face to face, I would love to sit down with a cup of tea and hear your story. And talk about the ways God is weaving hope into the midst of our brokenness. After walking through the heartbreak of 4 miscarriages, I have been forced to wrestle with what what the Bible says about God and how that relates to the pain I have experienced. By God’s grace (and lots of people’s prayers) I have found that in my deepest and darkest pain, God’s love is always deeper and more persistent.
I’m honored to share with you this journey of reflecting on those moments which, like the first rays of dawn stealing across a dark landscape, remind us of God’s Love in the very midst of grief and unanswered questions.
“The way of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, which shines ever brighter until the full light of day.” Proverbs 4:18
My favorite blog posts:
When I Don’t Know What To Believe Anymore
When life came crashing down and I found myself in a dark time of not knowing what to believe anymore, I needed tangible proof of God’s Love. Woven into the Jewish tabernacle and the Acacia tree is such a clear picture of Jesus on the cross, with a whiplashed back and a crown of thorns…
God Remembers Our Losses
I felt like God had left me alone to struggle through my grief from 3 miscarriages. But 3 miracles on Mother’s Day showed me so clearly that God understands the loss we experience, and cares deeply about our hearts.
When The Pain Doesn’t Make Sense
When the pain doesn’t make sense, what if I have a deeper problem going on? One that God is always helping me with, and not even the deepest pain in my life can stop Him from helping me?
Update on my life: My husband and I became foster parents in 2018, which effectively replaced all my extra time to write on here. My leaky gut symptoms improved dramatically in early 2019 thanks to a variety of different treatments and God’s grace. I became pregnant in 2019 and despite my trepidation, we were blessed with a healthy daughter in January 2020. And then in 2021 we adopted our 2 beautiful daughters, so my hands and life are overflowing with baby snuggles and giggles. The Lord has been gracious to bring gentle healing to my heart, as I continue to seek Him and process my years of chronic illness and childlessness. I pray that God will use the simple words written in this blog to encourage and comfort your heart as you look to Him.
The First Gleam of Dawn 
Thank you for checking out my blog. I’m glad you found something encouraging there! I suffered one miscarriage only, but I have friends who have been through multiple miscarriages – one who eventually had five children after four losses. I can’t imagine the pain of hoping, being excited and then losing a child – it breaks my heart for you. I guess I can relate slightly in other ways. Promises that don’t come when we expect or look like we hoped leave us flattened, don’t they? As you’ve so rightly said, those losses draw us closer to God as he comforts us even when we don’t understand what he is doing. I admire your faith and peace in spite of your great losses. Hold fast. I’ll be praying for you too!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thankyou, Laura. I appreciate your prayers and encouragement! And I have so very much appreciated reading your blog and seeing your beautiful and deep faith in God, through everything you have been through. God gets all the glory. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
My co-worker, like you endured 3 miscarriages. She is just days away from giving birth to her second child. She is very careful to obey all doctors orders for the best possible outcome. Please pray for her as she approaches her due date. Her name is Elizabeth and her due date is May 29th.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thankyou for your encouragement in sharing your coworker’s story. I will definitely be praying for Elizabeth and her baby, especially that she has a safe delivery at the end of May!
LikeLike
Do you have any update on how Elizabeth is doing? I’ve been praying for her and hoping that her and her new baby are healthy!
LikeLike
So sorry Julie, I just commented on another post. Elizabeth is doing fine. She is home safely with her second baby girl, Ireland Kelli. She was ever so careful throughout her pregnancy because like you, she lost too many. We are continuing to pray for you, our dear sister in Christ!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thankyou for your prayers. And I’m really glad to hear this news! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
While I have not gone through a miscarriage personally, I have experienced different kinds of loss. Every time, God has shown me some kind of Hope or gleam of dawn to look forward to. Not always in the midst of the loss, but after a short season. May God hold you close to his heart!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thankyou for your kind words. I agree with you that it’s always easier to see what God is doing in hindsight, instead of in the moment! Our experience of loss may be different, but the thread that weaves us together is Jesus. And I’m thankful for friends like you, who share the Hope of Jesus to encourage others on the journey! Btw- I love your blog! 😊
LikeLike