“You just had an unlucky roll of the dice.”
I think my doctor was trying to encourage me with those words. She followed that sentence with some statistics about how frequent miscarriages actually are, but I wasn’t really paying attention. I had just found out from her that I would be having another miscarriage.
Her words echoed in my brain over the next few weeks. How did I get so unlucky? IT’S NOT FAIR!
Driving one evening with my husband, I brought it up again… anger in my voice as I choked out my question of how God could allow me to experience this type of pain? Did God not love me, since he allowed me to fall on the heartache side of the miscarriage statistics? If He could do something about my pain, why wasn’t he?
My husband’s quiet response deflated my anger. He started talking about how incredible it is that our planet has billions of people living on it. And then ventured to wonder how many of us on this planet have heard of the power of Jesus to forgive our sins and save us for eternity? The Bible says in Romans 1:19-20 that everyone can clearly know about God through creation, and so have no excuse when standing before God. But there are still many places in the world where people have not heard about the saving grace offered through Jesus Christ. And of the people who know who Jesus is, how many have made a commitment to repent of their sins and follow God and will share eternity with Him?
When the highly statistical probability is to walk through one’s entire life without God…
IT’S SIMPLY NOT FAIR that God has allowed me to live in the community I do, hear the truth about Jesus, and have my soul saved for all of eternity. It really isn’t.
There’s a lot of things in life that I wish I didn’t have to deal with. Things that still threaten to twist my view of God and make me angry at Him for allowing them into my life. But when those lies start to steal in, I’m reminded that even if I have a lot of terrible stuff happen in this life that I feel I don’t deserve… there is something far greater that God has given me that I don’t deserve either– eternal life and a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this, that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Knowing this helps to answer my question of God’s love in the midst of my pain. I have to admit that God loves me more than I can imagine, because He has given me the incomprehensible gift of eternal life with Him. And dear Reader- no matter what you’ve been through or how far away God feels, please, please know that He offers you this incredible gift of Love and Forgiveness in Jesus.